The Boys Meet At The Golf Course
No more Stickball Games, no more Off-The Curb, no more Street Hockey. Grandfather Time has caught up with us.
“Oy!. I could hardly schlep my clubs to the golf cart.”
“You don’t listen. When I tell you to work out at the gym with me, you have a hundred excuses not to go.
“I have heartburn. White socks make my legs look bony. I can’t get a discount on good sneakers. A t-shirt will show my belly. My gym shorts crawl up my ass.“
“You have been going to the gym before you were born. I can’t just start it with a back that stabs me whenever I bend.”
“Oh. another excuse. I had rehab after my surgery and I still go to the gym.”
“Rehab, shmehab, how many more years do you think we have on this earth? Am I going to spend it torturing myself at a gym?”
“Get your clubs into the cart and let’s make fools of ourselves.”
“When are those misfits going to get off the first green? It looks like they’re having a debate on how to hold a putter.”
“Look at that yokel in the green plaid pants. He thinks he’s at the beach with his ball in that sand trap”
“Do you think you can do better?”
“With one hand tied behind my back.”
“And with the other hand you’ll eat at bagel with cream cheese.”
“Come on. They left the green. Tee off.”
“Is that the way the Pro taught you to stand? The golf ball for sure will fly into the woods. Roll down your sleeves, you might get poison ivy trying to retrieve it.”
“Oh. A smart ass. I’ll take my ball off the tee and you show me how to hit the ball.”
“If you didn’t learn from all the lessons you took from the club Pro and that CD guide, how can I help you?”
“Stand next to the ball the right way, hold the driver the right way, and turn your hips the right way. That should send the ball straight down the fairway.”
“If I hit the ball the right way, I wouldn’t be be playing with you.”
“Watch me.”
“Did you see it? Where did it go? Another five bucks shot to hell. I feel like leaving and drowning my clubs in that lake.”
“Let’s go and eat. This game is getting on my nerves.”
“A great idea, and maybe later we’ll go to the gym.”